From the Compost Pile ~ Combating the Fallback Lie

You are a fallback friend.

It’s a lie that has been whispered to me by the enemy since I was young.

No one would CHOOSE to be friends with you.

I still struggle with believing this.

You are okay to hang around if there is no one better to spend time with.

What lies have you believed about yourself? This is one of many that I have believed. It has taken a long time to combat with truth. I am NOT a fallback friend, and there actually ARE people who would CHOOSE me.

God was so kind to me this week to send my friend, Aisha, to Massanutten for a getaway with her husband and six-month-old baby (of six!). She messaged asking if we could get together, and in the midst of preparing for this school year, I was able to take some time off for a lunch date at Bowl of Good on Pt. Republic (go there!).

I am so glad that I fought for that time together. It would have been incredibly easy for me to come up with all kinds of reasons why it wouldn’t matter if it didn’t work out, when the truth was I NEEDED that time with a fellow sister in the trenches to process where we are, have been, are going.

Our backstory…

We met over two years ago when we were part of a team of women traveling to China to minister. Nothing bonds you like watermelon and wheatgrass shooters in a foreign country! We both mother many children (14 between us), and she is a holistic, homeschooling, amazing mom. We had many conversations and overcame quite a few obstacles (like the case of the missing money!), and lived to tell about it.

Some people come into your life for a small season and remain to give you a taste of heaven. Aisha is one of several of these women in my life. The kind that call or text and say Can you meet me tomorrow? When they live hours or days away.

During this time of transition and change, when I am struggling with feeling gotten, God has sent me several reminders that I am loved and people get me and would actually choose to be my friend.

And I am humbled and incredibly grateful.

(And yes, this looks like we are at Panera, because that is where we met up with her husband. For the record.)

2 thoughts on “From the Compost Pile ~ Combating the Fallback Lie

  1. Heather

    I ‘get’ this because I feel this; interesting I never would have thought you with all your joy & personality would though. As I mother, teach, & care-give to IsabelKate I feel like this more & more, seperated from the world around me & isolated from companionship…sad to say but true, the internet is my connection to the world.

  2. Davene Grace

    Oh, dear Julie, my heart breaks, thinking that you would ever feel this way. For me, you are SUCH a chosen friend!!! You have been a TREASURED part of these Virginia years for me, and I thank God continually that our paths crossed. I’m already looking forward to the next time we are able to get together – whenever that might be! 🙂


Thanks for heart-composting with me! I appreciate your words.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.